Anonymous
asked:
You have enlightened my mind, friend; i now know why a hate every house in my neighborhood. But *why* do these mcmansion monstrosities get built? Who profits? If anything, the well designed housed you point out seem simpler and more efficient to build than a comparable mcmansion, so why do they get made? (Thank you btw for this blessing of a blog).

McMansions get built for mostly two reasons: 

1.) Resale value, equity, or speculation on the part of investment banks. 

This is why so many housing developments sprung up between the Savings & Loan meltdown of the 80s and the Great Recession, which began in 2008. Often neighborhoods were financed by venture capitalists, rather than homebuyers or building companies. 

Why? To drum up more mortgages, bitches. More mortgages can be bundled into Mortgage-Backed Securities, an investment vehicle that could never possibly go wrong because people have to have to pay their mortgage or else they’ll lose their house. These can then be traded and sold for real monies. 

You know what’s better? Even if a mortgage looks like it’s gonna be a dud, we just bundle that shit mortgage with some decent mortgages. Like a shit sandwich, we but the shit-tier mortgages in a layer (called a tranche) on the bottom. Then we stack better mortgages on top of it, saving the best mortgages for the very last. Call it a collateralized debt obligation, another new investment vehicle. The decent mortgages will definitely protect the investment even if the shit mortgages default. Btw, these are all rated TRIPLE A MOTHERFUCKERS. 

It get’s even better, dawg. Why don’t we deal out mortgages to people with no jobs or assets and then put all these ULTRA SHITTY MORTGAGES into ONE MEGA SHITBALL MORTGAGE, sell it as an investment bundle called a credit default swap, and bet our money (and sweet investment vehicles) against it, so if people default on their mortgages WE WIN. Who cares if people lose their home we gettin rich sonnnnn. What could possibly go wrong???

2.) To be big. 

I’m talking really big. I’m talking way bigger than your house, Sandy. Your house looks like a little bitch next to my house. My house has 3 living rooms, 8 bedrooms and 11 bathrooms. Your house? I bet you don’t even have a double dishwasher, you lowlife piece of trash.